The Lemon

The lemon

 Growing up in a house where I was told every morning to get 100’s and all A’s, my expectations from the start were extremely high.  Call it nature vs. nurture or call it insanity but such is my life.

After being diagnosed with MS, it was decided that I needed to cool it and slow down.  I needed to stop having control over everything and let other people help. I also needed to not be “involved” in everything. Try telling a bride or any woman that she isn’t involved, see where you get. Want the answer... you get nothing. No seriously, I probably wouldn’t have any groceries and Im marrying a grocer. 

Let’s  first talk about the fact that I didn’t make a wedding website and I didn’t take engagement pictures yet.  #badbride I figured I could take the engagement pictures whenever  I felt like it, like when I hadn’t gained 50 lbs from steroids,  and I didn’t need a website because I had a pretty big mouth and talked to most people on a daily basis.

As it turns out the person I’m marrying wanted to have complete control over the hotel code portion of the wedding, and just like that with a whish of his magic wand gave the code to every human being he knew, and then I was stuck with no rooms.  Needing to sign a new contract because my invitations won’t be mailed until the summer and none of “my people” have booked because I didn’t make a wedding website providing information. Call me a slacker, call me whatever. I had like a million things on my mind. Disclaimer* I got more room’s because I became involved, so don’t worry.

After having a million and one things to do, I decided to add one more thing to my list and WalkMS, walk because today I can walk. I can walk all over the place without a walker or a cane so I may as well. Who knows where this crap MS is going to take me in the future so I might as well do what I can while I can do it. I decided to make a team and call them the “Fightin Irish”.  In my humble opinion and in the spirit of St. Patrick, the Irish are the great people in the world, and like them I am going to fight like holy hell for me and for Marshie and anyone else like us.

I wanted to make a team that would represent not only me but also my family, something that could get people together for a Sunday in April to walk and spend time together. Get to know one another, and help raise some money for a disease that is disabling, scary and downright dirty. 

My expectations starting this time were pretty low, sure I had asked people time before to walk with me but I didn’t really know what to expect.  I had no idea that my expectations would be surpassed.  I didn’t know that in minutes and only a few hours I would reach my low goal of $250 dollars. I had no idea how happy I would be when the MS society sent me an email that said “Time to do a Happy Dance, because I got donated”. I had no idea that all the people who read emotional blog would help out in ways that I only imagined and people would offer to walk with me. So I raised my goal to $1700.00. Lucky 17. 

 This disease has been pretty sour. I’ve seen it put people I love into wheelchairs, tear families apart, numb hands and feet and destroy anything it can. It’s been a lemon to say the least, and for me currently it feels pretty sour, sour in the sense that my vision feels like its failing me and driving in the dark as become challenging. My memory doesn’t seem on point at times, but yet I can remember what I wore 3 months ago on a Friday. Sometimes my hand feel weak and holding a pen in my right hand is difficult, but such is life. 

 Just like anything that’s sour, it eventually does have its rewards and benefits. But to get down to the benefit of anything you have to first cut it open  squeeze tight and take it for all that it’s worth.

Letter from the Editor:   

  My hope is to find a cure for this disease. Though it may seem out of reach at times, my expectation is to get other’s to familiarize themselves with it and provide support to families living with it. To have a world free of MS, to have this disease be  a thing of the past,  so the word’s you have MS will be never heard again “No Nay Never, No More”