Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall, Humpty Dumpty had a great fall....

 Fare: noun; what you have to pay to ride public transportation

Fair: adjective; agreeing with what is thought to be right or acceptable, treating people in a way that does not favor some over others, not too harsh or critical

Ted always says,” life isn’t fair, fare is what you pay to ride the bus”

What gives you might ask yourself.

 With my mom’s MS, her stability is not great. On Tuesday (St. Patricks’  Day) she fell down, got transported to the hospital, found out she broke her femer, and essential had hip surgery. Luck of the Irish huh? She’s Italian though so I think that may have had something to do with it. 

Marshie is now residing in a hospital bed and will be going to rehab over the weekend. What rehab? Well I’m not sure yet because insurance has to figure this one out. Hopefully she’ll be at one close by, and good at getting her back home as quickly as possible.

Last March she was also in and out of the hospital/rehab, where she stayed for over 2 months. To say that I am angry and disappointed is an understatement. I keep thinking to myself how this completely sucks. How much setbacks can one family have, let alone one person? For the past year she worked so hard at getting her life to a point that she was happy with. Cooking, baking, cleaning, and playing with Bailey. She had just been practicing walking without her leg brace for my wedding in August. Now we are back to the beginning. It’s like playing “Chutes and Ladder’s” but never actually winning. It sucks to not win, and I am a poor loser.

When I got this new job, I got to start over. No one knew my dad passed away, my mom had MS for over 10 years; can’t work or drive, or the fact that I have MS. I felt like a new person coming in here. I became someone without a “past”, someone who got to start all over again. 

Then Tuesday hit, I left work early and spent my favorite holiday in an ER. 

Upon returning to work people asked me how everything was. I told them the situation and that my mom had MS. Most said that it was a “tough” disease and they knew other’s that had it. They didn’t know much about it, and still don’t. It has taken everything out of me to not break down crying, or run out screaming that I also have MS, something inside stops me every time. I don’t want people to ask me how I am every day, tell me not to get stressed out or feel bad for me in general. I want to continue to be as normal as humanly possible. 

Sometimes, I want to not be me, but I am and I have to remember that this disease isn’t me.  It is just a part of who I am.

My mom’s birthday is on Monday. So will begin another year of her in life, in a position that she doesn’t want to be in, at a place that isn’t her home. But much like this disease that many say is “tough”, she continues to inspire me and be the toughest of them all. 

Setbacks only make you push back. 

Let the pushing begin.

Remember how I am doing the MS walk? Well, I haven’t reached my goal yet, and I would really like to. I’m really sick of the obstacles that disease brings and would like to put an end to it. To donate click HERE

THANK YOU !