Whats the irish word for family...second cousins

Most people are born into one thing FAMILY.  It’s very simple in fact. You take your family, much like you do with any plant and you water it, feed it, give it nutrient, sunlight and provide it with everything you’d want it to give back to you.  

For me, from the start my tree was always well nourished. I was born into a very loving family. Being a first born made me loved from the start. ( that’s so first child of me)  I was well wanted and prayed for at St. Patrick’s Cathedral in the hopes that I would be a baby girl, and as Irish luck would have it girl I was. For I was born with red hair, and since I’m oh so special I was announced over the radio by my papa. Ah that’s right famous from birth.

Just because you are first born in your home though does not make you special to the tens of other young kids around you, most importantly the rest of your family. Sure if you’re the first grandchild everyone dotes over you and buys you tricycles and plays games with you, entertains you. If you happen to fall in the middle then the jokes on you, If you’re like me growing up with nearly all male cousins on one side of the family you may have had a Davey Crocket hat thrown at your head to make you think it was a live animal. You may have had to create your own fun like making up plays and wearing old clothes for “costumes” and being the Beatles in your nana’s basement.  But nothing, no holiday or family get together could be complete without your cousins.

Cousins, we all have them. Some we’re close with others were not, But mainly they are people who see our families for what they’re worth. They are our first friends, the only kids at our first birthday parties and the only people who have old family videos of us to make even Miley Cyrus embarrassed.  Second cousins, first cousins once removed whatever the technological word is let’s just call them for what they really are, cousins.

I have enough cousins to make Kate Middleton jealous. Every time I talk to someone  I feel like I am  always referring  to one of my cousins, so much that a colleague of mine often asks how may cousins I actually have. So I organized my cousins into categories to make it easy for my friends and co-workers to know who I am talking about.   I have the Lilly cousins, the vineyard cousins, my cousin with the new baby, my cousin getting married, my other cousin getting married, my cousin who’s my best friend “the nurse”, my cousin who lives in Maine, my cousin with the little girl that comes in here and so on and so forth,

My dad was always very close with his cousin and this made me particularly close with my “second cousins”. These second cousins of mine share the same Irish swagger that I have and have a challenging time at biting their tongue but have done so when necessary. We are opionated, we are always right but most importantly we are all Moynihans. ( I sang the song when I wrote that DKM)

This weekend is my cousins wedding OTV, That’s a fancy word for On The Vineyard. (Any of you moms out there, I know you are familiar with fancy words thanks to Fancy Nancy). I have been waiting for this wedding since I first met Karen, mainly because these two fit together like Guiliana fits Bill. They just work. I love that they aren’t over the top, or bragging how much they love each other, they are actual real people. This is as refreshing as an outdoor shower on the cape.

 

I have been thinking about this day since I got their gorgeous save the date in the mail last fall and couldn’t wait to show TK what the Vineyard was all about. I was excited to be cheesy and instagram us on the Flying Horses, and hanging out on the Island Queen.  Much to my “surprise” TK told me he would be working this wedding weekend and would be unable to attend the wedding. ( womp womp ) He reminded me multiple times that if I liked living in Boston and wanted to wear Lululemon pants and drink Starbucks he would need to work for a living and would not be able to make it. So I pulled up Boston Strong pants and moved on with my life. And now I am trying to pack all my luggage into one bag since I won’t have anyone but myself to carry it for me.

So this weekend I am going back to my roots and being “Before TK Bridget”.  I’ll be OTV with my cousins and pretending that the weekend doesn’t end of Sunday and celebrating everything that LOVE, LIFE and FAMILY has to offer.

 I may also be hoping they are doing some last minute filming of The Vineyard for ABC Family because a girl can dream can’t she? Especially someone who’s birth was announced over the radio

 

All my love C & D xoxo 

You CAN stop, and you SHOULD stop

Being born in the mid 80’s, I’m more a 90’s girl than anything else. I grew up pretending to be Stephanie from Full House, to Topanga in Boy Meets World all the way to Laura in Family Matters.  I loved keds, jelly shoes, and colored socks. I had bangs and often wore turtlenecks under my crewneck.  I listen to the New Kids with my cousins and lived for making brownies in my easy bake oven. I loved everything that the 90’s gave us except for Miley Cyrus.

 I don’t know where Miley’s house was or where she is now that she can’t turn on ABC Family and learn some valuable life lessons.  Maybe she could learn how to dress like one of her teachers, just as DJ did. She’d end up spending the day in a telephone booth, but the lessons at the end of the day was of far more value than “We Can’t Stop” . I hate stuffed animals, so I obviously hate Miley’s ridiculous video and MTV stuffed twerking fest. As far as I’m concerned the only thing stuffed should be a Turkey on Thanksgiving.

Being an oldmaid, I don’t have any kids. But I have a silly 7 year old sidekick that I often refer to as my best friend.  This little girl always makes me laugh and from day one always made my grey skys blue. I’m pretty sure she doesn’t understand that I’m a grown up because she often asks when I grow up what will I name my kids.I told her I wanted to introduce her to NSYNC Sunday night and of course she was on board.  But as it turns out NSYNC would be on toward the end of the evening and we’d have to move past Miss Miley first. Once this hot mess hit the tv, I decided it was time for a change. I was told I didn’t need to change the station because she was only in her “bathing suit”. Agreeing, so I wouldn’t have to explain I changed anyways and used the infamous line “Because I said so.”  We watched some marvelous movie on Nickelodeon and moved on, but still wanting to see NSYNC I stayed in one room waiting for the appearance and was told to call her when they came on tv. And that I did. I introduced my best friend to NSYNC. She asked me how many people were in the group and I said 5, she told me it was the same as One Direction, and the bond was there. I heard how she doesn’t like Justin Beiber anymore, because he does drugs and that she likes someone new instead.  Win, Win !  Days later, I got a text from Mama, telling me that she went to bed with a ponytail to the side just like Bridget does.

That is why being a mid 80’s- 90’s girl is always so much better.  Because, in the midst of me wanting to show a little kid who the best boy band ever was, I taught her about side pony’s. If you’re a mom, aunt, cousin, anyone, turn on ABC Family and show these kids some real tv. Show them why Jesse and the Rippers and the Beach Boys are amazing, and how being Steve Urkel can turn you into Stephan and how maybe when your 8 you can find your crazy, weird Topanga.

Teach them about life lessons on tv, and drink your wine. Just don’t drink that Miley Kool Aid.

 

 

My Favorite Things

Attention everyone!

 It’s Labor Day Weekend. It’s the end of the summer, and everyone is headed down the Cape, or up to NH or someplace where there is water  and I am working all weekend. I don’t mind at all. As a matter of a fact today on my way home it only took me 40 minutes, due to everyone being stuck in traffic trying to head elsewhere. So while all of you are soaking up the sun. I will be at the MACYS 3 day Labor Day Weekend Sale buying gifts off of everyone’s registries. If you haven’t registered yet and you are planning on getting married within the next year, please feel free to head on over to Macy’s before the end of day Monday so I can use my coupons on your gifts.

In all seriousness, I am not a registry girl. I almost never buy off of registries not for babies or for brides. I like to find something special that they can use and think of me.

Here are a few of my favorite things:

The Beloved Special Plate !  If you are special you’ve received this gift from one of the Maher’s. The special plate is a red plate that can be purchased from Wards Gifts in Medford or off of the RedPlateStore.com.  The Special Plate is a red plate that says you are special today on it. In my family and maybe yours you get to use this plate on special days. If it’s your birthday, you got your license or anything that might be special to you then the plate is yours for the day. The Special Plate is something my nana gave to everyone in my family and we all love it. So when my nana passed away my mom took it over and now gives it to everyone she knows and I do the same.  I strongly encourage purchasing this for anyone for an engagement/shower/birthday or anniversary gift. It’s provides memories that last a lifetime. And if you are giving it for a birthday, may I recommend the Money Cake on top of the plate. The Money Cake is an angel food cake, made best by my Auntie and you wrap coins up in wax paper (after the cake is baked) and put them into the cake. The Money Cake is a HUGE Hit !

The Wedding Dress Hanger. The Wedding Dress hanger can usually be purchased through Etsy. There are hundreds of people who make them. You pick the wood color and tell the designer what you would like the wire to say, usually I pick the bride’s soon to be last name: ie: KAMAS.  My “MAGNET” first introduced me to this gift years ago when she gave it to our friend the Bride the night before her wedding. The hanger is a wonderful treasure to have and can be used on the day of the wedding to take pictures of the wedding dress before it’s on the bride. You can add flowers or whatever you’d like to jazz it up as well. I usually like to head over to Victories Secret and purchase some fun undies or lingerie(depending on the bride) to put on the hanger for the ultimate presentation.

 

The Wine Basket. A favorite for my wine drinking friends. This is my latest gift to give. This consumes a lot of time. So don’t wait until the night before to do this. The wine basket is something I found on Pinterest. First you will want to choose a basket. Then you fill the basket up with 8 bottles of wine and attach poems to them. The poems are for different events that will occur for the bride and groom. They go from First Christmas, to First Fight, all the way to First Baby. I like to make sure I do fun wines to go with each poem. For example I did B*tch Wine for First Fight and Mommy’s Time Out for First Baby. You will want to punch a hole in the paper that the poem is printed on, attach it to cardstock if you’d like and then tie a pretty ribbon through the hole and attach it to the wine bottle. The only complaint I have ever gotten on this was that I needed to provide a wine for the wedding shower? Yes, apparently brides are stressed and like to drink wine immediately. This will be helpful for the bride and groom once they get home. They can drink this as  they are going through and unpacking all their gifts.

 

And now since I am in Baby Land. I have a few gifts for Baby Showers and Introduction to Baby Parties.

The Everywhere Chair from Pottery Barn is a must. This chair is the greatest thing ever, you can pick out a fabric and get the child’s name monogrammed on the chair (if the mom tells you ahead of time, which none of my mom friends do…THANKS A LOT!) You can take your babies picture on it every month to see how they grow. Then you can post it on instragram  and tag @brijie to show me and everyone else how nice I am. #bestsecondcousinever

 

Another fun gift for my girl babies is of course Bitty Baby. Everyone needs a Bitty Baby. 1. Because she is the best baby doll ever 2. Because you are contributing to my future. Bitty is the most lovable baby you’ll ever meet, and years down the road when she gets older and plays with Bitty you can buy her outfits, a crib, and product galore.

 And lastly my new hot gift on the market is the Blanket Prince George came home in from the hospital. I cannot tell you where you can buy this because they are currently sold out everywhere.  But if are lucky enough to catch this hot item, make sure you buy an extra one and save it for me. I mean come on I deserve this celebrity baby blanket just as much as the next girl.

 

When purchasing gifts for your friends, remember it’s ok to buy something for yourself too! You deserve it.  If you feel like purchasing me a gift I am registered at Lilly Pulitzer, Sperry, Kate Spade and many other stores. And if your TK, I am registered at Barmakian Jewelers. 

 

   Congratulations to all my friends and family who are lucky enough to have me in their life and receive some of my favorite things!

 

Xoxo

B

Never had a friend like you

I went to the smallest college in the history of the world in the state of NH nonetheless.  (I don’t care if it’s not the smallest, it is to me. And believe me when you walk into the Café and everyone knows your boyfriend broke up with you before you do then you can call if what you want) I went there for an education of course but also to grow as an individual. To experience dating and of course meet people who would want me to be in their wedding.

During my time at school I fell hard for my very own version of MR. BIG.  During my time with MR. BIG I went through many highs and lows. But always standing by me was my solid group of friends who were there to pick me up off the bathroom floor.  

Some of these friends were afraid of me when we first met. They quite literally saw me coming down the hallway or in the cafeteria and would run the other way when they heard my voice. One friend wore overalls and red ribbons in her hair. (Please throw these out NOW Char)  Other friends took to me right away, much like the friendship Blair and Serena had on Gossip Girl.  We all hated qualities in one another (like who we were dating) and loved others. We may have talked about one another behind the shower curtain, but always had the courage to share the rumors to each other’s faces. While many of us have grown up and gotten married, are having babies, planning a wedding or just living the 27 year old single girls dream we always try and make the best effort we can to still be there for one another. We still gossip and have conversations as though we are sitting at the dining table together.

I grew up never having a sister and finding these ladies was one of the greatest gifts I could have even gotten. Each one of them is completely different and the only qualities I think we all share is the love we have for one another and the love we share for wine and cheese.

This weekend was my go to gals Bachelorette Party. I refer to this friend as Princess Jasmine. While Jasmine is not an actual princess she is living her dream of becoming one. She does not have a magic carpet, but does have her very own Aladdin. She is always fashionable and is a fierce friend, loyal companion and the hardest working person I’ve ever met in my life.

Now Jasmine and I have a very honest relationship. She was my mother’s friend first and both of them are always sure to remind me of that.  She is the only friend that I speak to on the phone and we talk at least 5 times a week. We complain, laugh and cry. She is in one word amazing.  She is always thinking of others, and this weekend she proved it. We have taken the blame for one another when we needed to and driven each other around after a few rounds to many.

Normally when you attend a bachelorette party you fill rooms with sexual straw and balloons. You buy the bride a sash, and a crown and a shirt and practically make her look like Honey Boo Boo.  But as it turns out Princess Jasmine did not want to be a princess she wanted to take off her crown and share the life she enjoys so much with everyone she loves.

Jasmine is a true friend, when I feel like Belle locked in a tower with the awful Beast (sorry TK your not a BEAST at all, except when its bedtime) she always finds a way to smuggle me in necessities  and make me enjoy life and everything it has to offer. She’s been my sister when I needed it and let me borrow her Burberry Bag when she thought it would make me smile.  Her friendship may have started off with me in fear but I think once she got past being afraid of my loud voice she actually grew to love it standing up for us.

REAL friends are hard to come by, difficult to lose and impossible to live without. I would have to say I could not have survived the past 5.5 years without you. When it felt like everything in my life was crashing down around me. You gave me a card that was empty inside and it filled my heart with laughter. You have made me appreciate everyday and realize that everyone has their own struggle and story.

Congratulations to you Princess. I’m glad I paid over a million dollars to go to the smallest college in the existence of the world to meet you and call you my friend. I’ve never had a friend like you.

OPA !!!!!

*Solid friend don’t think I don’t love you as much as Jasmine. Your post is coming.

Happy Anniversary... I got you on my mind

Today would be my parents 30th Wedding Anniversary.  Sadly after 24 good years of marriage my dad passed away and my mom was left a widow. I’m sure if my dad was around he wouldn’t want a party, they never celebrated it much at least from what I knew. But in today’s age 30 years is a long time to be married.

In most wedding vows, we commit to loving one another through sickness and health, for richer or poorer, through good times and the bad.   These vows themselves could not be more true for my parents. After being married for nearly 3 years they were blessed with me. This got me thinking a lot about where I am at the age of 27. My mom was married when she was 30 and had me right before her 33 birthday. She’s always said that she was glad she had all this time to travel and do things for her. She worked hard and enjoyed her life. My dad stopped working when I was born to care for me. He gave up a job he loved and one he shared with his family to care for his new family. This is the ultimate gift that my parents could ever give me. They taught me the value of a family and time. My dad never complained that he had to stop working he was happy to have all this time with us. They never complained that they had only one salary to care for a family of four, the complaints were nonexistent. It was a sacrifice they made for us, their kids.

 At age 30, my mom never cared how old she was when she got married; she wasn’t comparing herself to all of her friends or in a rush to get on with life. Instead she was enjoying the rid  I can’t say that we’re the same in that retrospect. I am always looking at what everyone is doing, trying to keep up with the soon to be Jones’ or the even the Kardashian’s. Even though we have our difference of opinions on life that’s ok. She always taught me that having your own opinion makes for good conversation and to follow your heart. Her advice on love was that you would know it was real when it was right.  Which brings me to my toast. (*You know the toast I would make if there was an actual party).

 My mom and dad went through good times and bad just as anyone does but they’ve certainly had their share of sickness and health. My dad got cancer when I was 3 and my mom cared for him and stood by his side and did anything a good wife would do. Then when I was in high school my mom got diagnosed with MS ( Multiple Sclerosis) . This disease took away her ability to walk. She uses a walker, but also relies on a wheelchair. It also made her give up a job she loved for over 25 years.  Through sickness and health my parents saw each other through everything. They always supported one another and hated on the fact that these disease’s were awful and would try to ruin a family. 

The cancer left and we stayed together. The MS remained but we conquered it. We figured out a lifestyle that would allow us to be comfortable and happy and tolerant to this disease. Of course there are days that we cry that we are alone without my dad, and sad that people don’t keep in touch nearly as much as they used to when he was around. We get angry that we can’t do things without the support of one another, and we (I) yell when the pain is intolerable.

But in the end LOVE conquers all. We are still a family. And while my dad isn’t here to celebrate his 30th wedding anniversary, the rest of us can celebrate for him. For if it wasn’t for falling in love my mom never would have had the gift of love that keeps on giving her the strength she needs to get up and go on.

I hope that my jealousy comes to a halt and that years from now I can look back and see how foolish I am.  I will realize that what’s important in the end of your life is the time you had and spent with other people. That’s what adds value to your life. Not the sickness, but the health, not the money but the time.

The time will always matter more, because I can promise you this when you’re at your wits end and you need one more thing in your day it will most always be TIME.

You can buy anything online

There are many things one can buy on-line. Shoes from Kim K on ShoeDazzle, Bubble Necklaces from China that take 3 weeks to arrive, or concert tickets to Jay-Z and JT. If you’re like me you may find that shopping on line is simple and involves no interaction with any other human being. I personally would much rather shop alone. No one is there to judge me or tell me that I don’t need something or be the opposite and force me into buying ridiculous amounts of wall décor at HomeGoods. If I shop with anyone it’s usually MJ. Were like partners in crime, we have our favorite Marshalls and usually hit up Panera or Tavern in the Square when we’re through. I like to blame her for my problems with me needing a new outfit for every occasion, for it was her who looked through photo albums every Thanksgiving Eve to make sure she didn’t wear something similar last Thanksgiving.

While there is a lot you can buy online, it turns out you can actually buy your boyfriend there to. After going alone to many weddings and ringing in New Years alone for a number of years, I decided it was time to get down to business. I needed a husband. But, you can’t just ask someone if they want to marry you right away. So why not head to Match.com. This is a perfect opportunity for you to put all your crazy out on a platter at once. I was at the point where there was no shame in my game. I made my mind up just as I had all those days shopping at Marshalls. I needed a boyfriend and I needed him immediately.

My profile so to speak told people ridiculous things about me. I mentioned how I HATE when people touch the radio in my car, how I’m known to kick and cry on the kitchen floor if I don’t get things I want, how I have 6 very best friends who I lived with through college and how most importantly that despite the crazy that I come with, I’m obsessed with Love.

Turns out, people like crazy. I was asked on a date almost immediately. We talked for a few days, and decided we would go out to dinner in the North End. We would meet there on a Wednesday night.  I told MJ that I was going on a date and where I would be. I let my two best gals know I was headed into the dating world.  I planned my outfit since the minute we made plans to go on the date. I decided on my tall black boots, black blazer, curly hair and my new Kate Spade bracelet that I had just gotten for my birthday. Etched on the inside of the bangle was, An Ace Up Your Sleeve. With the bracelet came a card that said it was “My Year” it was from my sidekick, partner in crime cousin who had been through hell and back with me.

 On my way into town I felt like something was wrong my car, but being the typical girl that I am I kept driving because I didn’t want to be late. I arrived early to the parking garage where my car began to smoke. I got out, ignored the smoke and began to walk. I called my cousin informed her of my whereabouts and my car situation, she suggested maybe I call someone who could help her considering she was two hours away. I ignored the advice and kept walking. I went inside and found out I was early, and there was no reservations. I began to wonder if I was at the wrong place, but continued to walk towards the bar. I sat upon a stool, had my first glass of pinot and waited for my date. He arrived late saying he got caught up at work ( awesome). We talked, wined and dined and things ended smoothly. We said our goodbyes, and as we left I thought he was pretty nice and we could be friends for a long time. I walked back up to the top floor of the garage, began to drive my car down the ramp onto the highway towards home, where my car stalled.  I called AAA, and a nice Tow Truck towed me off the highway before AAA came. I sat in a parking lot, with a cell phone just about deal waiting to hear when the Tow would arrive. My date texted me multiple times, said he had a great time and was just checking to make sure I got home ok. (how nice I though, for usually I was the one frantically texting wondering when we would see each other again)  I said I was home and never let him know my car got towed, as far as I knew a Damsel in Distress was tacky. I got home and dropped my car off to get fixed.  I found out a few days later that the car was pretty much gone, we had a good run me and my car, but it was time for us to move on. My dad and I picked the car out together a few months before he passed away. It was a huge deal for us, it was green and it was wonderful. It was something that the two of us shared together but it was time for us to part and time for me to move on and find something else wonderful in my life.

 

And that’s how the story goes. One day you wake up and decide you want your life to be better. Maybe you join match.com or a gym or hop on plane across the country to follow your heart.  You put all your positive energy into something and the universe hears you. For me, my dad heard me and he decided that making my car die on 95North was a good way for me to wake up and check into reality and date a grocer, just as he had been.  

 

*Disclaimer: For those of you I told TK and I met differently, I apologize. In the in end it doesn’t really matter how you met but how you stayed together.

Always a bridemsaid

On Facebook I have 698 friends. . In real life I have 5, ok maybe more, but you get the idea. When it comes to wedding life I have 100,000 friends or at least that’s how it feels. This year alone I've been invited to 8 weddings. I'm attending 5.



When I was a kid, I went to 2 weddings. My cousin Cathy's and, oh,  wait maybe that was only one I was invited to. I couldn't understand why no one would invite me or better yet, ask me to be in their wedding. I mean who doesn't want a cute red head with chubby cheeks as their flower girl. As legend has it, no one's really interested in that. But, now that I'm the ripe age of 27, everyone wants to see these chubby cheeks in their monumental wedding album.



 I should start off by saying that I don’t have a favorite wedding. They all have their spectacular moments. I have enjoyed the champagne, steak, salads, and enjoyed looking at the cakes, though I’ve never tried one.  I loved absolutely the whole event, whether I went there by myself or with a date and you better believe I’ve had my share of solo swag. But that’s another story.

 

I've been in 3 weddings to count and 1 more this fall. I've worn blue, brown, and upcoming black.. I look great in all these colors too, or at least that’s what people tell me.  I'm pretty easy going when it comes to dresses, I say yes and go on with handing my cash over to the cashier. Then I enjoy a cocktail after the hemming process is over. I always go a size up in dress, no matter what anyone says. I learned this lesson the hard way in Wedding #1.

 

 Days before I went to the wedding I was at home calling my neighbor up to come try and zip me in, living in fear for the next 4 days that I may in fact not be able to walk down the aisle. The BIG day I tried holding both hands up in the air and not breathing for 45 seconds until 3 girls finally got the dress zipped up, . That day I also forgot my strapless bra, but since I’m nice and friendly (when I want to be) I made a friend who let me borrow theirs. Since then I always go a size up. I never ask what the magic number is because I really don’t care. I just move past the digit and accept the fact that not all dresses are made the same.

 

Wedding number #2 was a whole different ball game. I was now an “experienced” bridesmaid. I knew my role. That role was always say…. YES! No matter what just say YES, to the bride. She will thank you later, and you can always remind her how kind you were to her. This will allow you the ability to have the option to be a Bridezilla to all your friends when it’s your turn. This is not something however that I recommend for most people I know don’t tend to like Bridezillas and you may find that they may throw a bigger party at your wedding brunch, thanking sweet Jesus the event is over.

 

Being in a wedding should be fun. You get to wear a beautiful dress that may or may not make you feel/look like a Kardashian. You can get your hair blown into a prom-do, and most importantly come out dancing to a Rap Song. Before saying yes to your friend, ask her who you’re going to walk into the reception with. This is a game changer, if you have someone poopy, offer another suggestion. If your fun and like attention like me then tell her you are going to kick off her night. You are setting the tone for the event, you’re gonna get the people going !  If she sets you up for success, then you win! Just remember to reciprocate.

 

And onto Wedding #3. I am now a Veteran! I’ve been down this street before. I say YES to everything, I go on trips to stores to look for shoes, I drink lots of cocktails, I arrive early, I have the dance to the rap song already in my head, I am ready to train my groomsmen our dance ensemble. I am good to go.  And as usual, everything works out perfectly.

 

 I have helped planned the showers, I have attended the bachelorette parties and now I will wait until they get pregnant on their honeymoon and I can shower them with gifts yet again, All the while waiting for my bling ring,